Goodbye to my father

This is a song about death, and this is a story about death.

My father’s death.

I bought my tickets to the Wardruna show at Red Rocks months ago on a total whim. I’ve been listening to Wardruna for years, their music is my favorite (ever!) but I don’t think I’ve been to any concert at all since 2009!

Purchasing this ticket was an act of the gods.

Long story short: I almost canceled. The week before the show I found out that my father was dying - a huge and sudden shock.

My friend Michelle intervened and convinced me not to cancel. I got on the plane to CO and we went to the show. Another act of the gods.

Toward the end of the show … well … the reel speaks for itself.

4 days later, I received the call - my father was actively dying.

In fact, he was actively dying and, forever a scrappy fella, actively fighting death at the same time. As you might imagine this created a tremendous push / pull on his body. He was distressed.

I went about my day bracing hard against the inevitable. In the afternoon, the memory of this experience at the Wardruna show hit.

I dropped everything and played this song in the reel, humming along. Then I found lyrics.

In an undoubtedly botched attempt at reading and singing in Old Norse, I sang this song over and over, again and again.

It’s hard to find adequate words but singing brought so much peace, release, love …

And acceptance of the Death that was bringing itself into my Life.

It was holy.

My papa left a few hours later.

As it turns out, at the time that I sat to sing him through, he settled out of extreme agitation and began his transition, peacefully.

It’s a few days after his death. I swear I can hear him laughing his ass off.

He was a one of a kind renegade, free spirit magician of a man. Barely on this earth even in life, he lived by his own rules. He was a prolific play-by-ear musician; a musical genius, eccentric as hell, with a wild streak of mystic coursing through his veins.

I’ll hold the belief that he was pleased to be sung out of this life by his eccentric as hell, wild streak of a mystic daughter and the epic souls of Warduna.

Singing does heal.

My god, does it heal.